408. True Mother and the True Family
Book 4: May You Blossom, My Beloved
Part 2: The Holy Wedding and the Path of the Bride of Heaven
Chapter 4: True Mother and the True Family
True Mother's beautiful nature
Mother is a woman of great wisdom. Also, her eyes are magnificent. When she smiles, I am completely mesmerized by her charming eyes. She has such beautiful eyes. I really like Mother's nose too. When she senses something good is coming, she laughs in such a way that her nostrils start to flutter. I am not sure if this is part of Mother's charm, but I tell you that, as her husband, it moves my heart. Also, if we encounter a grave or serious situation, Mother tries not to purse her lips and thus show she is upset. When I see her wisely restraining herself like that, I find her lips even more beautiful. Mother also has a lovely demeanor. Indeed, she has many great qualities. I think wives who possess these graces carry the secret keys to solve all problems and make all things go well. (127-093, 1983.05.05)
Having studied Chinese classics, I am familiar with the traditions of Korea's past generations, and from their standpoint, Mother is a very proper woman. When she keeps gently still, she expresses internal qualities unsurpassed by anyone and worthy of respect. Hence, when I teach that this is the essence of the beauty of Eastern women, Western men automatically understand what I am saying and they want to marry Eastern women. That influence has been great. Among Western brothers, many said they decided to marry Eastern sisters because they thought the sisters would be like Mother. From this perspective, I believe Mother contributed greatly to teaching members around the world about the ideal image of an Eastern woman. (170-037, 1987.11.01)
These days Mother has a higher reputation than I do. They say she has not only Oriental beauty but also Western beauty. Therefore, I have learned many things from her. I received a great deal of Oriental training, but not so much Western training. For example, when I eat, I stuff a lot of food into my mouth all at once. I don't eat gracefully. I just think of enjoying the food. But Mother wipes my mouth each time I make a mess. (113-149, 1981.05.01)
People say that Reverend Moon's wife is beautiful. I am studying what a true beauty is. Beauty is not defined by a beautiful face. A beautiful mind is what defines beauty. Even if you were to scold such beauty for 1,000 years, that beauty would maintain the harmonious and pure image of a woman who could laugh throughout those 1,000 years while maintaining her beauty intact. It is such a person who can beautifully brighten and embrace her environment. I believe that such a woman stands out among beautiful women. (220-175, 1991.10.19)
Mother has no personal self-interest. You can see this clearly through our wedding ring. She doesn't know who it is that she gave it to. She gave away her engagement ring and her wedding ring to others. It is no ordinary woman who can give her things to the members and then forget about it like that. I respect and praise Mother from this perspective. I praise Mother. (170-036, 1987.11.1)
That period when we were on a world tour was a difficult time. The Netherlands is famous for diamond processing. Knowing that, I deliberately passed by a diamond factory and asked Mother to select one. Not having much money back then, I asked her to choose a small one with the best color, since we couldn't choose a big one. We bought one and later I asked her, "Where is your ring?" She replied, "Where would it go? It simply flowed away.” She had given it to someone else. (175-321, 1988.05.01)
Mother has a great side to her. These days she has been giving away her possessions, so much so that I asked her not to. She has given away everything, including even our engagement ring. While touring 40 nations during my first world tour in 1965, I bought a one-carat diamond ring in the Netherlands because I had not given her a nice wedding ring at the time of our marriage. However, when I asked her where the ring had gone, she said she had given it to someone else and she could not remember who it was. That is why her engagement ring, and her wedding ring as well, were gone. I buy clothes for her too, but when I open our closet, there are only a few left inside. She basically shares everything with others. (196-294, 1990.01.02)
A good characteristic of Mother is that she likes giving to others. When she does, she doesn't want to give something bad, so she gives them the best of what she has. That is her great quality. As a result, however, her wedding ring and the other gifts I have given her have all gone. She even forgets to whom she gave them. When the season changes and I open our closet, she has no clothes inside. She already has given them to others. I am also such a person. When I have something good, I don't use it for myself. (175-064, 1988.04.07)
Mother has many good qualities. She is wonderful. You can know this by simply looking at her face. Once she has made up her mind, she goes till the end. Mother's determination to bring an end to the whole complex mountain of pain and anguish within her lifetime is even stronger than mine. (222-277, 1991.11.03)
She is an excellent mother. Having grown up under the embracing influence of the founders of three religious groups, she is connected with everything important from history. We finally have a historic repository or a treasure house who is worthy to stand in the position of Mother. She is a type that can love individuals or families from any country. If I buy her something precious, she gives it away to somebody without my knowing it. (590-330, 2008.05.25)
Mother took many outfits with her for the events in Europe, but when she returned she did not have any of them. She gave all of them away to the members. I think she even gave away her wedding ring, because she did not have it when she came back. When I asked her about it, she said she was not sure what had happened to it. You have to forget about the things you have given away. The person who gives her life and love and forgets having given it is the one who can be closest to God. (238-153, 1992.11.22)
Mother is originally very gentle. In the past, when we were in Cheongpa-dong, she always used the same path to go back and forth. I watched her carefully. Whenever she went out and came back, whether it was once or twice in the same day, I took notice of what path she walked on, and she always took exactly the same path. The next time, she again used that same path. That is because she follows the proper path. (232-307, 1992.07.10)
Mother may look gentle on the outside, but she is very bold. You can tell as soon as you look at her. Her hands reveal this trait. Mother's face looks friendly and gentle, but her hands tell a different story. They are thick and bold. She will not budge an inch even when she is standing on the stage. This is how I knew she was ready for the position of Mother. (227-189, 1992.02.11)
Mother, this woman whom I have married, is truly great. Her greatness does not come from a beautiful face but from a beautiful heart. Even her beautiful voice and her graceful manner are because of her beautiful heart. I am a teacher who teaches God's philosophy by actually living it. Because I am living according to the Principle, I praise Mother and promote her in public on God's behalf. This is in accordance with the Principle. (229-224, 1992.04.12)
One of Mother's special qualities is that she is intuitive. This is an inborn quality. Further, whenever I ask her to do something, she makes a firm resolution to fulfill it. Then she never forgets that resolution until it is done. That is why she has been able to overcome every trial on her path. She has perseverance and patience for God's purpose. Another reason I am very grateful to Mother is that she is very giving. She always wants to give away her most precious possessions, not only to our own children but also to all of you, at any time and without hesitation. I believe that this trait of her personality is a God-given gift. (092-329, 1977.05.03)
To me, Mother is flawless. I see nothing but goodness in her. This did not just happen overnight. Whenever she meets people, if they are men, she compares each one with me and thinks, "This man has a quality just like True Father.” By thinking that way, she can be openhearted toward them. It is so beautiful. Look at her eyes and hands. They show how observant and sensitive she is. When she hears me speak a sentence, she analyzes its structure—what the subject is, what the object is, what the clauses are, and so forth. What I am saying is that she is smart and analyzes things well. In her teens, her friends said she was an impressive and unforgettable girl, and I think it is because of her powers of observation. When she went places, she was prudent about the routes she chose. She would travel only on the routes that she felt comfortable with. (435-020, 2004.01.31)
A couple with true love
If Mother had asserted herself, it would have been difficult. Thanks to her absolute submission, we passed through everything in the shortest possible time. I truly respect Mother on this note. I know that she does not compromise when it comes to the way of the Principle. You need to trust your husband or wife. You need to know what kind of person your wife is. Once a person makes a decision, that person should be able to advocate for his or her position in front of everybody and make sure the decision is not forgotten. This is the only way that person can take responsibility. One must not live and act thoughtlessly, as one pleases. (102-047, 1978.11.19)
You need to understand: Although it is easy to become a teacher in the Unification Church, it is difficult to become a leader who is supported and welcomed by Mother. It is easier to play my role as a teacher at the podium in front of all the members than in front of Mother. Mother believes in me more than she does you. Mother believes in me more than you believe in me. You must know that she respects me in all aspects. (103-147, 1979.02.18)
I can tell you something about Mother. Sometimes Mother asks, "You love me, don't you?" and I say, "Yes.” If she says, "How much?” I reply, "My love is as big as you.” In replying that way, I am saying that my love is the biggest possible, since I could never say I loved her more than I loved God. As a person who attends Heaven, I do not speak carelessly. Since I haven't been able to truly love God yet, at least I must practice such courtesy with my spouse in our life as a couple. (112-065, 1981.03.29)
Because of the Fall of Adam and Eve, we have lost the love of a mother, the love of a wife, and the love of a younger sister. We have lost three great loves. From a woman's perspective, she has lost the love of a father, the love of a husband, and the love of an older brother. Even in Satan's world, living without a father is not proper. It is a failure according to the most fundamental principle. If you cannot live more happily than anybody in Satan's world, you are failures. If you cannot love your wife more than your own sister, it is a failure. Your wife is a holy being who has now appeared in front of you as a representative fruit of the feminine image of three ages; therefore, you must be grateful to Heavenly Father.
I call Mother "Omma.” I don't follow the Korean custom of using one of our children's names and call her "So-and-so's Omma,” just "Omma.” In the early days, when I returned from being away somewhere, I would report to Mother all night about everything I had been doing. You must become a man of whom a woman cannot be suspicious, even if she tries to be. Therefore, whatever you do, you must first discuss it with your wife and then do it. You must ask her if she has an opinion about what should be done. (047-223, 1971.08.28)
I made a promise with Mother. I asked her, "In the United States it is considered quite natural to hold hands; not doing so may actually seem more awkward. Here in Korea, I cannot hold hands, because it is awkward to do so. How would you like to do this?" Mother replied, "What's awkward about it? We should walk holding hands.” I ended up receiving instructions! That is why, when Mother holds my hands on a platform where she is speaking, I keep still and do not remove my hand. Mother tells people that her husband loves his wife more than any other man in Korea loves his wife, more than any other man in the world. There is also a rumor among Americans that I love Mother. This has happened not because I was good to Mother but because Mother did well. Mother really does well. Her face is beautiful, and her mind is beautiful as well. She also speaks well and is good at everything. (101-167, 1978.10.28)
I am a fearsome person. I face the world fiercely, and yet, when I come back to Mother, I am beaming with smiles. I am the opposite. Mother must also be bold when she goes out into society. We must have both aspects. We must be strong and yet soft, soft and yet strong. (129-053, 1983.10.01)
I have told you that in love there is shared inheritance, equal status and shared participation. Based on this, we also can take part in God's position. Wherever we go, we can stand in the same position as God. Mother also stands in the same position as me. We stand in a position with the right of equality night or day. What belongs to Mother is Father's, and what belongs to Father is Mother's. (171-116, 1987.12.13)
Man and woman are born for their partners. No matter how great a person I may be, I was born for Mother. Would Mother feel happy or bad about this? What greater happiness can there be as a woman? Once we were in a plane and I asked her, "How different does it feel to be going to Japan with me instead of going alone?" Wouldn't that be a difference as wide as the gap between heaven and earth? I cannot describe her expression in words. No matter how great I may be, I must consider Mother to be more precious than I am. Mother would not feel bad, would she? Hence, I would like to ask all the men of the Unification Church following me to please uphold this tradition as a fundamental principle, inherit it, and compete against one another to be the most loving husbands. If you do so, your wives will respect you as Mother respects me. (228-159, 1992.03.27)
Raising True Children with love
I must have 12 sons and daughters. Twelve children are a must. There are 12 directions, 12 months in a year and four seasons. In addition, there are 12 gates to Heaven. Hence, the 12 directions must be filled. Thankfully, Mother has had 13 children. I need people who can take my place when I am no longer here; hence, centered on the 13 children, in line with the 12 directions, we must establish a foundation like the 12 gates to Heaven, through which we can communicate with the spiritual world from the physical world. Centered on the natural law of the firstborn son and second son centered on the parents, the family line can be carried on naturally. Once this traditional pattern is expanded horizontally, this will become the heavenly nation. (121-252, 1982.10.27)
It is normal to have only one or two children in the United States. Hence, if you have three or four, people open their mouth in surprise. When you tell them you have ten children, people are shocked. Yet, do you know how many times Mother had a cesarean section? If she hadn't had cesarean sections, I believe she certainly could have given birth to even 21 children. Mother almost died giving birth to a child while I was in Germany. So she had no choice but to have a cesarean section. I understand how much she has suffered. (202-069, 1990.05.06)
Older people find no greater joy than embracing their grandsons and granddaughters. Mother is like this too. You cannot imagine how much she loves her grandsons and granddaughters. With her own sons and daughters, she was more reserved; however, once we started to have grandchildren, she found their every word so magical. She says that when a grandchild calls her, saying, "Grandma!" and then embraces her, it is just as wonderful as a hug from her husband.
She says it is like looking at a flower, smelling its fragrance and swallowing its fruit all at once. She can't get enough of her grandchildren. (197-033, 1990.01.07)
When you look at Mother, you can see she is not an ordinary woman. After the difficult history that began with her grandmother, she must stand in a position where she can distinguish between all directions and determine the direction of goodness; a position where she has established the relative standard of love that can find that one right path, that one ideal path for her husband; a position where, based on the principled trajectory, she comes to possess eternal value as an object in front of her subject to the degree that she can eternally assert that value without any possibility of complications. This is the position Mother must stand in as Mother. We must support such a woman and advance together. (173-177, 1988.02.14)
Mother establishes her husband's authority within the family and trusts him as a true teacher. It is about practicing what one preaches. Hence, Mother will educate the children, saying, "You must resemble your father. Your father is a great person.” (173-177, 1988.02.14)
No matter how busy our day was or how late we returned, until our children reached the age of 12, we always kissed them goodnight. We always gave them a kiss every day. When we kissed them, we would say, "You missed Mommy and Daddy, didn't you? We're sorry.” When saying sorry, our throats would become choked with tears. Then I would say, "You probably don't know that your Father has a path to follow. If I don't fulfill my responsibility, humankind will be destroyed, and so will heaven. So please bear with us, even if it is difficult. After you turn 22, you will come to understand your father and mother.” (200-134, 1990.02.24)
I tell Mother that throughout their lives our children should never shed a tear caused by a fight between their parents. We must live in such a way that our children can say, "We have never seen our father and mother fight.” Children are the most fearsome judges. Ours sons and daughters are witnesses that can be recognized in front of Heaven. (100-303, 1978.10.22)
No matter how disappointed you are, never deal with your children with a flushed and angry face. This is my philosophy. As a result, our children always think of us as a peaceful and harmonious father and mother. They think Mother is the best among mothers and Father is the best among fathers. Their father and mother are like second Gods to them. If asked, "Would you want to have God or your mother and father?" and they answer, "We want our father and mother,” God also will be happy. This is precious. This is the most precious teaching of all. (165-094, 1987.05.20)
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